I don’t wanna be anything other than me.

Lately Ive been feeling like I need to do something more. Like I need to make a differnece somehow but I don’t know how or what I am
looking for. How do you make your life matter? I want to know I’m affecting someones life in a positive way that leaves a real impact.
I feel like right now I’m just living, but I’m not doing anything important, or making any sort of lasting impact.

One of my favorite T.V shows “One Tree Hill” came to an end last night. This show has always been a huge inspiration for me. I’ve
never connected with a show like I have with “One Tree Hill” It’s weird to have grown up with a show, and watch it come to an end. For
the last 9 years One Tree Hill has been a huge part of my life, bigger then I could have ever imagined. Which is weird since it is
just a show, but it’s also so much more. I was in 10th grade when One Tree Hill began. I really do believe part of who am I is because
of what I learned from watching this show. It definitely has always inspired me to make my life matter, and to do great things.

I put a lot of emotion behind everything I do. I always consider the fact that everything I’m doing has the ability to change my life,
and to leave a lasting memory so I always try to make whatever I am doing count. I really think a huge part of why I’m like that is
from this show, or maybe I connect with the show so well because I am like that? I guess I’m not sure but I do know One Tree Hill has
given me direction, courage, and it has taught me a lot about myself. I’ve learned about my compassion, and to never be afraid to care
too much about anything. I’m never in fear of loving something or someone too much, and I don’t regret taking chances. I’m not afraid
of rejection. I’ll always regret not sharing my feelings so openly or to have others not know how I feel, but I’ll never regret the
fact that I did share my feelings. Rejection and dissapointment is a part of life and it’s important to experience it. It’s how you
learn about yourself and what’s important to you.

Back to the show for a second.. I feel like it’s time for it to end, but I’ll miss having it in my life. It’s the end of an era. The
show had such a beautiful cast and it was awesome watching them grow up with the show. It may have not always been the most creative  story line or the best acting but they always did everything in their own way and made it special. They new how to connect with their fans, and they created really inspiring messages during every season. In my opinion the best and most real episode was the school shooting. Which was a huge epsiode for the remaing premise of the show, if you are a fan you know what I am talking about. That episode was so real, and important. It would be impossible to not grasp the emotion behing every scene in that episode. Of course
there was tons of other episodes that were amazing, and heart warming, or inspiring. I just think that one was exceptionally amazing. My love for music began with this show, music is a huge part of “One Tree Hill” and the show really showed me how much music can affect your life and your feelings. Music is therapy to me now and a huge part of my life, so I’m very thankful this show helped me find that. It was a show about growing up, like tons of shows are but this one just knew how to really connect with the fans.

The biggest impact I get from this show is how everything we do affects everyones life and it’s important to do great things so that you
make real impact that matters. Last nights episode reminded me how important it is to me to make a difference but I’m still struggling
with how to. Maybe there isn’t one thing that I can do that will fufill this feeling. Maybe I’ll never feel like I’m making an impact,
I’m not sure. I guess we all search and wonder what were supposed to be doing right? Still I have this feeling there is something
more I can be doing, I just need to find it. Until then I’ll just keep being me because I know through all my faults I have a lot of
great qualities too and I will eventually find exactly what I am supposed to be doing. Until then I’ll just continue this lovely roller coaster called life.

Make a wish and place it in your heart.
Anything you want, everything you want.
Do you have it? Good!
Now believe it can come true.
You never know where the next miracle is gonna come from.
The next memory, the next smile, the next whish come true.
But if you believe that it’s right around the corner
and you open your heart and mind to the possibility of it,
to the certainty of it.
You just might get the thing you wished for,
The world is full of magic.
You just have to believe in it.
So make your wish. Do you have it?
Good! Now believe in it with all your heart.

Sharing inspiration.

I just read a blog from one of my favorite musician and writer Chad Sugg, I related so much to what he had said that I want to share it.

“I’m pretty sure I’m like everyone you’ve ever met, and I’m like no one you’ve ever met.
I have the same emotions/feelings as everyone, I just express them differently.
I’m quiet. Until you get to know me
I get nervous about things most people probably wouldn’t even notice in day to day life.
I love humans.
I hate how humans treat each other.
I like things that make me feel nostalgic.
When I have nightmares, I wake up and have to turn my TV on to feel safe.
You know when people say they “have big imaginations”? Well, mine really does reach a bit too far at times, in both good and bad ways. It’s why I’m afraid of the dark. It’s also why I believe I like so many of the things I enjoy.
I don’t receive compliments well when they come from people who are close to me, I think it’s because I respect their opinions so much.
I love making friends, but it takes a certain kind of person for me to feel comfortable enough to talk to them regularly.
I hate negativity. (Is that a double negative?)
I like people helping people, and I like when people help people.

When are we gonna realize we’re all the same? We’re all hurting, happy, lost, beautiful, ugly, young, old, tired, learning, trying to forget, trying to remember, wandering, wondering, dreaming… But we don’t know it. We’re all so surprised to hear someone feels the same way as we do. We’re all so shocked when someone “gets it” like we do. Why is that?

I get it, we’re all different… But, I’m beginning to think that pales to the comparison of how alike we are. We all want to be different, but we also want to be the same. We want acceptance. We want love. We want to be heard. We want friends. We want it all.

We’re weird. Humans, that is.
I like it”.

The stuff in purple is stuff I added, otherwise it is no way my own words. Just something I 100% agree with and relate to.

On another note I just was directed to this musician Ed Sheeran and I am in love! Check him out … right now.

Okay time to take my sick self back to bed.

XOXO

Kayla

I have never heard of The Weepies, or there song “Be My Honeypie” but this video is so heart warming and cute.

It kind of reminds me of one of my favorite songs from Bright Eyes “First Day of My Life”

Not sure if I’ve posted that before or not so I will again just in case!

**Update: Turns out I have heard of The Weepies, just never knew it. Definitely a fan**

Pursuit of Happiness

♥ This song

I’m on the pursuit of happiness and I know everything that shine ain’t always gonna be gold
I’ll be fine once I get it, I’ll be good.

Seeing him July 12 w/Kayla!!

Is it weird …

that sometimes “sad” songs make me happier?

Either this is an odd quirk about me or it’s pretty common. I’m sure the mood I am in before I listen to these “sad” songs makes a difference but sometimes after listening to “Sad”, and I put Sad in quotations because I’m not sure if everyone would consider them sad, but I do.  Maybe they aren’t sad they just sound sad but there more inspiring instead?, idk but I get this feeling that I can’t explain … it’s a good feeling though.

Does anyone get what I’m talking about?

This week has been busy and long. Getting up at 4am sure is an adjustment.

I’ve began working out everyday before work. Which means I am up at 4am, at the gym by 4:20 am.

I love the feeling that I am doing something so wonderful for myself. I hope I stick with it, working out is so important. Even if you don’t want to lose weight. It helps your body so much. It’s just something you need to do, End of story. I decided to do it before work because then I won’t get busy, or make excuses.

It’s hard getting up at 4am sometimes, but what’s helped me the most is that I announced I’m doing this on my Facebook. So I have all my family and friends keeping my accountable. That’s actually helped a lot! I can guarantee I would let myself go back to sleep if I hadn’t done that. Once I get to the gym I’m motivated, and ready to go. My biggest thing is getting up and going so I’m really glad I shared this with others so that I actually do go. I plan to share more about this as I continue so stay tuned on that :)

I’m definitely living my life for me right now. Not in a selfish way though, at all. I’m spending more time with everyone I care about, working out to stay healthy and to get healthier, working hard at my job, and focusing on my future. It makes me excited when I think of all the awesome things going on right now. Sometimes I think wow all this good stuff is going on, what’s going to go bad? Then I realize everything that’s good is because I’m focused on my life and improving it. It’s not fate that’s making it good, it’s hard work and dedication and nothing besides giving up can take it away. I like having control of my happiness.

I hope everyone whose reading has had a good week!

When nothing is owed, deserved or expected
And your life doesn’t change by the man that’s elected
If you’re loved by someone you’re never rejected
Decide what to be and go be it.

I am in awe of this photo. One of the most beautiful aspects of photography is one picture can mean so many different things to different people. A photo can remind someone of something they once knew, it can inspire them to do something, or to act a certain way, it can bring happiness, and it can bring sadness.

This photo inspires me, makes me hopeful, and it makes me happy.

To me it resembles uncertainty, hopefulness, and excitement. You can’t see what’s around the bend but you have a feeling whatever it is it’s going to be amazing. Which is how I feel about my life right now. I have no clue what the future has in store but I can feel inside of myself that it’s going to be filled with wonderful things.

I am also in love with this song from The Avett Brothers called “Head Full Of Doubt/Road Full Of Promise”. I encourage you all to go listen .. and to make it easy for you I’ve attached it below. Enjoy :)

https://makebelievetillnothingsreal.wordpress.com/2011/05/23/179/

Josh Stewart .. Amazing Voice

Last post and then I need to get ready for the day! I JUST heard of Josh Stewart but what an AMAZING voice.

Check out his website @ http://www.songsforjude.com/

Here’s a sample of his music .. warning you will melt when you listen.